Vanderbilt got shut out last week by Florida, at least according to the officials who disallowed Chris Pierce’s touchdown catch just before halftime, their second shutout in as many tries in SEC play this season.
This week’s opponent, South Carolina, is not Florida or Georgia. The Gamecocks come in with a 3-3 record, 0-3 in SEC play, with losses already to Georgia, Kentucky, and Tennessee. On the other hand, they’ve won 12 in a row against Vanderbilt. Will Vanderbilt break the streak on Saturday?
While I can see Vanderbilt having a shot against South Carolina on Saturday, predicting that it will actually happen is something I will not do. South Carolina is vulnerable because they don’t seem to have much of an offense, but then, UConn scored 28 points on Vanderbilt’s defense.
Where looking decent for a half before losing to Florida made us feel somewhat better, doing the same thing against South Carolina will not. I am predicting that these teams will still look like they’re coached by Derek Mason and Will Muschamp.
The Pick: South Carolina 21, Vanderbilt 7
The SEC Upset Pick of the Week: (sigh) This is Tennessee over Ole Miss, isn’t it?
Andrew VU ‘04
This is probably our best chance at an SEC win in the 2021 season (though we have about an equal chance to pick up a Big XII win on October 30th), so we should be looking forward to this one, right?
While an average Vanderbilt team in the 2000s would likely be favored against this South Cackalacky Game Penises squad, the 2021 Vanderbilt feetball team is hardly average, even by our standards. It’s not even an average Vanderbilt team by Bobby Johnson’s standards.
I have to assume Penis Edge Rusher Kingsley Enagbare (which, let’s just say, with a name like that, he should be playing for us, right?) will tear our O-Line a new one.
On the other side of the ball, whether it’s Luke Doty or Zeb “Please Clap” Noland at QB, our D just doesn’t have the size nor speed to truly be a hindrance to their offensive game plan. Luckily, they’re enough of a hindrance to themselves, so I don’t expect them to boat-race us. Zeb!
It’ll be loss #13 in a row. We’ll cover the spread, though.
The Pick: Game Penises 27 – Vanderbilt 13.
The SEC Upset Pick of the Week: The one that’s most likely is THE GAME THAT SHALL NOT BE NAMED, so I’ll go happy-go-jacky on this one and say THE CAYUTS will beat the Dogs in Athens. (I may have started drinking early this week.)
Nope. You cannot convince me to pick Vanderbilt. No chance. You could tell me their entire team was in COVID protocol and Vanderbilt had cloned (and gotten NCAA eligible) 22 NFL HoFers in their prime. Still taking South Cackalacky and their glorious Cockabooses.
Assuming The Dore Report’s “bombshell” was not indicative of an all-out mutiny, the Commodores should cover. As I said in Lessons, this team has flashes of cromulence. They have the ability to win this game (but Chicken Curse). They could also play like they did against UConn and ETSU en route to an embarrassing loss.
The Pick: Vanderbilt 17, South Carolina 20
The SEC Upset Pick of the Week: Eagles over Piggies. War Damn.
I am ashamed to admit that I will personally at this slop fest. I have actually seen many in my time having attended both schools. That being said, it’s going to be a game where Vanderbilt scores very little and the Gamecocks score medium.
The Pick: South Carolina 23 – Vandy 3
The SEC Upset Pick of the Week: This is a bit like the scene in Anchorman where Ron Burgundy is deciding between saving Veronica Corningstone or telling the news story. On the one hand I hate picking Tennessee, on the other I am from Georgia and there is a sports suffering few understand. Go Dawgs. I’ll pick nasty orange (sorry y’all).
It’s been a tough week. Why not get my hopes up to get crushed again on Saturday? Join me and talk yourself into Vanderbilt winning on the road against South Carolina. I’ll buy the first round after the game when everyone else in our lives has disowned us for continuing to pour emotional energy into this football team.
In all honesty, I think Vandy has a chance tomorrow. Forgive me while I try to take some positivity out of a 42-0 loss to Florida las week, but this offense ran over 50 plays in the first half against Florida and made it to the red zone five times. We all want to believe in some kind of growth for this team throughout the season, and I saw progress six days ago. Whether or not its enough progress to overcome a 18 point spread, who knows, but I’ll take the bait this time.
The Pick: Vanderbilt 24, USC 17
The SEC Upset Pick of the Week: Lots of potential victims to choose from. Let’s pick on Arkansas, who will catch Bo Nix on a good week and lose to visiting Auburn.